Not good

No, I slept extremely badly, thanks for asking. For once, the source of my nighttime woe was not 40 inches long and pink with big, blue eyes. There I was at 2am, decanting manky radiator water from one of my finest saucepans into the butler sink. And then again, at 5.30, when my husband had to get up and go to Brussels. The Chubby Queen slept through it all.

Not in the best of moods, I rallied my French and my most assertive manner, and called the geronce at 8.30am (they manage the building, I mean 'manage' in the loosest sense ever in the history of the world. Loose like Jezebel.) Anyway, three phone calls later - watch the assertiveness teeter, then plummet full tilt into naked aggression - and I am still at home, it's dark, I have waited in all day, my baby is crying, the radiator is still leaking and I am passing the time looking up things like "lazy", "timewasting", "incompetent", "idiots."